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Another update
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Another update

› Forums › General Melanoma Community › Another update

  • Post
    • October 19, 2020 at 5:13 pm
    sks2019
    Participant
      providind anpther update on my , she was admitted into ER on Sept 14 with organ failure , kidneys had shut down and doc told us its going to be only few more hours and we shouldnt go for ventilator and dialysis to support her. I coudnt let her go , I wasnt prepared for it. I asked them to put the ventilator and dialysis. Today Oct 19 she is stll in hospital but dong much better. Blood work looks in normal range ecept for ALT , ALP number which are 3x than normal. Her kidneys have come back and she hasnt needed dialysis or 1 week now. Doctors think she doesnt needs dialysis anymore.
      She is very immobile and cant lift a glass of water so needs continous support. The team is now talkig about options
      1. Re-challenge temodar which they think caused tumor lysis for her and brought her into ER . She will need hospital stay ( which is already taxing on her ) and doesnt buy her much time.
      2. Hospice

      I am not sure what to do , I am only taking one day at a time and working on gettting her feel better and feeding her to gain some strength.
      How does the end looks like , its so hard to see this suffering.

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        • October 19, 2020 at 11:34 pm
        CynthiaLee
        Participant
          Sometimes no matter how hard we try we can’t fix things as we would like to. At this point, if I was the patient or the caregiver. I would look at quality over quantity of life.
          Hospice can be a wonderful resource, my mother had dementia, heart failure and kidney failure. She was with hospice about a year. The resources are endless, the support much needed and the help appreciated. My mother passed away in her own home as she always wanted (even if she probably didn’t know it).
          I also think, you need to ask what the patient really wants if able to tell you. I know its hard, losing both my parents I saw my dad also suffer congestive heart failure and be on dialysis. He told the doctors no more dialysis and they told him he would die without it….he repeated no more dialysis.
          He knew what he wanted and we took it to heart. This is just my take on it, if you both want to pursue more aggressive treatment and feel that is right then that is what you should do. It’s hard for sure.
          • October 20, 2020 at 3:59 am
          Daisy2018
          Participant
            Husks,
            I was thinking about you guys.
            When my father was sick and beat up with chemo and radiation and CDiff he acquired at the hospital we took time to regroup and heal. It took us a month.

            The positives are her kidneys bounced back pretty nicely. Liver enzymes may go down after some time. I assume her heart is holding up too?
            The negatives are she is very weak The medicine she was getting if she will get it again it will again cause her kidney and liver damage and she is not strong enough. It will cause just suffering. She probably is lot able to get any cancer treatment now.
            How is her appetite? Does she want fight? One of my friends said once the body can go on for long time it’s the mind that gives up. I try to approach my cancer as what I would say or do with my father. It’s easier to make decisions than. When it comes to my own cancer I need to consult my family it’s easier to make a decision this way.
            If it was my father I would say bring her home take care of her for a month make her comfortable and reapproch subject of cancer once she gets better.
            I don’t think you have to make decisions about hospice or no hospice now. Bring her home and see how she looks in a month and than make a decision. Have some quality time whatever it maybe now. Re-evaluate later.
            My prayers are with you and your mother. Hugs.

              • October 21, 2020 at 4:34 pm
              sks2019
              Participant
                Thanks you Daisy028 , I had teh same thoughts. Thankfully her appetite is ok and her feeding tube is also out now. Only issue right now is the strength. She has been in bed for more than a month and even sitting straight makes her tired. I am scared to bring her home looking at how much support she needs but i know she will be able to gain her strength much faster if she is home compared to a nursing facility which is not even allowing any visitors due to covid. Living isolated in a nursing faciity will make her more sick. Thanks for listening and getting back. Makes me feel better.
                • October 22, 2020 at 2:57 am
                Daisy2018
                Participant
                  You are a brave woman. Your mother is lucky to have you.
                  Physical therapy would help. Doctor can order it at home.
                  Get her up in chair/ recliner during the day. Good food, hydration, lots of love and positive thinking. Time will tell.
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