New member, my wife has just been diagnosed with atypical mole sundrome
REGISTER
The information on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Content within the patient forum is user-generated and has not been reviewed by medical professionals. Other sections of the Melanoma Research Foundation website include information that has been reviewed by medical professionals as appropriate. All medical decisions should be made in consultation with your doctor or other qualified medical professional.

New member, my wife has just been diagnosed with atypical mole sundrome

› Forums › Cutaneous Melanoma Community › New member, my wife has just been diagnosed with atypical mole sundrome

  • Post
    • March 16, 2014 at 6:35 pm
    Dean548
    Participant

      Hi,

      Firstly I'd like to say what a good idea this forum is and think its good people can support each other and share experiences. 

      My wife has just been diagnosed with atypical mole syndrome after a mole started to itch. We saw a dermatologist who said the moles in question were ok at the moment. She has 3-4 atypical miles and over 100 other moles. 

      My wife's mum died of skin cancer 10 years ago and my wife is now going to see a gene specialist and check ups every 6 months.  The dermatologist took pictures of all the moles so we can monitor them. 

      I've got to be honest I don't know what I'm expecting to gain from posting this but I feel I need to talk to others who would understand. I feel lost, I know a melsnoma has not been diagnosed but we are both worried that it will be especially with the family history. 

      My wife is 28 were recently married and planning on starting a family soon so this has come as a bit of a shock.

      I suppose what I am trying to ask is does anyone have any advice for us? I've read countless articles online and just scare myself, it feels like I'm waiting for sonething to happen. I want to do anything I can for her and help her keep on top of this. She does not know I have posted on here yet. 

      im sorry if this seems silly as I am aware it could be a lot worse but I really didn't know where else to go. 

      I hope someone can help/ reassure us! 

       

      Thanks in advance 

      dean

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

    Viewing 5 reply threads
    • Replies
        • March 16, 2014 at 7:03 pm
        Janner
        Participant

          Just because your wife has been diagnosed with atypical nevus syndrome (also called dysplastic nevus syndrome) doesn't mean she will get melanoma.  Yes, her risk is higher.  But the thing is, you are on top of things.  You know about melanoma – #1.  You're taking steps for early detection with photographs – #2.  She's having regular checkups – #3.  You are doing everything right!  There is no way to "prevent" melanoma in this case, but you can be your own best advocate.  Pay attention to her skin.  And just be there and be supportive.  There is no need to investigate melanoma further at this point.  You may not get there.  And since you are on top of things, chances are you'd catch anything early anyway.  Don't go there now.  Just keep up with what you are doing!

          Best wishes,

          Janner

          • March 16, 2014 at 7:03 pm
          Janner
          Participant

            Just because your wife has been diagnosed with atypical nevus syndrome (also called dysplastic nevus syndrome) doesn't mean she will get melanoma.  Yes, her risk is higher.  But the thing is, you are on top of things.  You know about melanoma – #1.  You're taking steps for early detection with photographs – #2.  She's having regular checkups – #3.  You are doing everything right!  There is no way to "prevent" melanoma in this case, but you can be your own best advocate.  Pay attention to her skin.  And just be there and be supportive.  There is no need to investigate melanoma further at this point.  You may not get there.  And since you are on top of things, chances are you'd catch anything early anyway.  Don't go there now.  Just keep up with what you are doing!

            Best wishes,

            Janner

            • March 16, 2014 at 7:03 pm
            Janner
            Participant

              Just because your wife has been diagnosed with atypical nevus syndrome (also called dysplastic nevus syndrome) doesn't mean she will get melanoma.  Yes, her risk is higher.  But the thing is, you are on top of things.  You know about melanoma – #1.  You're taking steps for early detection with photographs – #2.  She's having regular checkups – #3.  You are doing everything right!  There is no way to "prevent" melanoma in this case, but you can be your own best advocate.  Pay attention to her skin.  And just be there and be supportive.  There is no need to investigate melanoma further at this point.  You may not get there.  And since you are on top of things, chances are you'd catch anything early anyway.  Don't go there now.  Just keep up with what you are doing!

              Best wishes,

              Janner

              • March 17, 2014 at 3:04 am
              Swanee
              Participant

                Hi Dean,

                I certainly understand your concern and I'm sorry that your wife lost her mum at such an early age. Obviously as children, it leaves a scar that cannot be removed, but that may be a good thing!  As a parent and a stage IV survivor, my children are of my utmost concern and I'm constantly aware of their inherited risks.  There are no silly questions, feelings or thoughts on this website, we all understand the paranoia that accompanies melanoma.  

                Janner's advice is sound and keeps things in perspective and it's only natural that our minds go to the what if''s and the worst case scenarios!  Please don't despair,  for this is a natural course of thinking and over time you will learn to reign in those thoughts and stay on top of those negative feelings.  One could associate these kind of negative feelings with anything that can be blamed for the loss of a loved one, car accident, influenza, heart attack or any sort of unfortunate circumstance.  Whatever the cause, that will be the one foremost on our mind.

                The most important part to living…..is living.  Enjoy each day, knowing it may be your last, and this advice is relevant to you, just the same as it is to your wife.  None of us know when our time on earth will be up and we can easily waste it away worrying about the "if" and "when."  We all know we will die, but we know not when, where or how!   Death is not to be afraid of, for it will happen…..respect and embrace it, for it is just as important as the day you were born.

                Wishing you a long and happy life with your loved one!

                Swanee

                 

                • March 17, 2014 at 3:04 am
                Swanee
                Participant

                  Hi Dean,

                  I certainly understand your concern and I'm sorry that your wife lost her mum at such an early age. Obviously as children, it leaves a scar that cannot be removed, but that may be a good thing!  As a parent and a stage IV survivor, my children are of my utmost concern and I'm constantly aware of their inherited risks.  There are no silly questions, feelings or thoughts on this website, we all understand the paranoia that accompanies melanoma.  

                  Janner's advice is sound and keeps things in perspective and it's only natural that our minds go to the what if''s and the worst case scenarios!  Please don't despair,  for this is a natural course of thinking and over time you will learn to reign in those thoughts and stay on top of those negative feelings.  One could associate these kind of negative feelings with anything that can be blamed for the loss of a loved one, car accident, influenza, heart attack or any sort of unfortunate circumstance.  Whatever the cause, that will be the one foremost on our mind.

                  The most important part to living…..is living.  Enjoy each day, knowing it may be your last, and this advice is relevant to you, just the same as it is to your wife.  None of us know when our time on earth will be up and we can easily waste it away worrying about the "if" and "when."  We all know we will die, but we know not when, where or how!   Death is not to be afraid of, for it will happen…..respect and embrace it, for it is just as important as the day you were born.

                  Wishing you a long and happy life with your loved one!

                  Swanee

                   

                  • March 17, 2014 at 3:04 am
                  Swanee
                  Participant

                    Hi Dean,

                    I certainly understand your concern and I'm sorry that your wife lost her mum at such an early age. Obviously as children, it leaves a scar that cannot be removed, but that may be a good thing!  As a parent and a stage IV survivor, my children are of my utmost concern and I'm constantly aware of their inherited risks.  There are no silly questions, feelings or thoughts on this website, we all understand the paranoia that accompanies melanoma.  

                    Janner's advice is sound and keeps things in perspective and it's only natural that our minds go to the what if''s and the worst case scenarios!  Please don't despair,  for this is a natural course of thinking and over time you will learn to reign in those thoughts and stay on top of those negative feelings.  One could associate these kind of negative feelings with anything that can be blamed for the loss of a loved one, car accident, influenza, heart attack or any sort of unfortunate circumstance.  Whatever the cause, that will be the one foremost on our mind.

                    The most important part to living…..is living.  Enjoy each day, knowing it may be your last, and this advice is relevant to you, just the same as it is to your wife.  None of us know when our time on earth will be up and we can easily waste it away worrying about the "if" and "when."  We all know we will die, but we know not when, where or how!   Death is not to be afraid of, for it will happen…..respect and embrace it, for it is just as important as the day you were born.

                    Wishing you a long and happy life with your loved one!

                    Swanee

                     

                      • March 17, 2014 at 5:24 pm
                      Dean548
                      Participant

                        Thankyou both for your replies.

                        I agree with everything you have said and will take it on board. We always knew there was potentially a risk but when it's confirmed things are more 'real'. It definately makes you respect life and other people and what they are going through.

                        Thankyou very much for your kind replies it has made us both feel better (I've told her I'm on here now!)  

                        its nice to know there are people about who can support and help others when in need. 

                         

                        Thanks again 

                        Dean

                        • March 17, 2014 at 5:24 pm
                        Dean548
                        Participant

                          Thankyou both for your replies.

                          I agree with everything you have said and will take it on board. We always knew there was potentially a risk but when it's confirmed things are more 'real'. It definately makes you respect life and other people and what they are going through.

                          Thankyou very much for your kind replies it has made us both feel better (I've told her I'm on here now!)  

                          its nice to know there are people about who can support and help others when in need. 

                           

                          Thanks again 

                          Dean

                          • March 17, 2014 at 5:24 pm
                          Dean548
                          Participant

                            Thankyou both for your replies.

                            I agree with everything you have said and will take it on board. We always knew there was potentially a risk but when it's confirmed things are more 'real'. It definately makes you respect life and other people and what they are going through.

                            Thankyou very much for your kind replies it has made us both feel better (I've told her I'm on here now!)  

                            its nice to know there are people about who can support and help others when in need. 

                             

                            Thanks again 

                            Dean

                            • March 18, 2014 at 2:40 pm
                            Joanie60
                            Participant

                              Hey Dean, I am going to throw my two cents in as well. My grandfather and my  mother both had melanoma (both survived, no problems).  I have countless moles that are weird. So I knew I was at risk, and acted accordingly. I went to a dermotologist every six months. In 2000, I noticed a mole that was changing, went to my doc, had it biopsied, it was melanoma, then had a wide excision done. Boom, problem over. Fast forward, 2014, I am going through it again. Because I go every six months for a full body check, the melanoma has not spread to my lymph node system.

                              I asked my doc in 2000 if I should get genetic testing done to see if I was at higher risk. He said: if test comes back that you are at higher risk, I will have you come in every six months. If the test comes back that you are not at higher risk, I will have you come in every six months. DUH!! So, no testing for me haha.

                              Melanoma is one of the "better" cancers to be at risk for, because early detection is the key. If you KNOW you are at risk, you go get checked and stay on top of it. My dermo in 2000 also told me that if a melanoma started growing the very day after my six month check, it would still be surgically removable at the next six month check. 

                              So you are not silly!! I am so glad you reached out for help because hopefully you have found comfort. Since your mother in law died from the disease, it is totally understandable. But now your wife is forewarned. And your children, when they come, will have sunscreen on them all the time I bet! My grandad, my mom, and I did not. My own children did. They have never been sunburned!! Wish I could say the same, but it was a different time.

                              You guys are in my thoughts and I wish you only the best as you go through the wonderful journey of life and marriage and parenthood!!

                               

                              • March 18, 2014 at 2:40 pm
                              Joanie60
                              Participant

                                Hey Dean, I am going to throw my two cents in as well. My grandfather and my  mother both had melanoma (both survived, no problems).  I have countless moles that are weird. So I knew I was at risk, and acted accordingly. I went to a dermotologist every six months. In 2000, I noticed a mole that was changing, went to my doc, had it biopsied, it was melanoma, then had a wide excision done. Boom, problem over. Fast forward, 2014, I am going through it again. Because I go every six months for a full body check, the melanoma has not spread to my lymph node system.

                                I asked my doc in 2000 if I should get genetic testing done to see if I was at higher risk. He said: if test comes back that you are at higher risk, I will have you come in every six months. If the test comes back that you are not at higher risk, I will have you come in every six months. DUH!! So, no testing for me haha.

                                Melanoma is one of the "better" cancers to be at risk for, because early detection is the key. If you KNOW you are at risk, you go get checked and stay on top of it. My dermo in 2000 also told me that if a melanoma started growing the very day after my six month check, it would still be surgically removable at the next six month check. 

                                So you are not silly!! I am so glad you reached out for help because hopefully you have found comfort. Since your mother in law died from the disease, it is totally understandable. But now your wife is forewarned. And your children, when they come, will have sunscreen on them all the time I bet! My grandad, my mom, and I did not. My own children did. They have never been sunburned!! Wish I could say the same, but it was a different time.

                                You guys are in my thoughts and I wish you only the best as you go through the wonderful journey of life and marriage and parenthood!!

                                 

                                • March 18, 2014 at 2:40 pm
                                Joanie60
                                Participant

                                  Hey Dean, I am going to throw my two cents in as well. My grandfather and my  mother both had melanoma (both survived, no problems).  I have countless moles that are weird. So I knew I was at risk, and acted accordingly. I went to a dermotologist every six months. In 2000, I noticed a mole that was changing, went to my doc, had it biopsied, it was melanoma, then had a wide excision done. Boom, problem over. Fast forward, 2014, I am going through it again. Because I go every six months for a full body check, the melanoma has not spread to my lymph node system.

                                  I asked my doc in 2000 if I should get genetic testing done to see if I was at higher risk. He said: if test comes back that you are at higher risk, I will have you come in every six months. If the test comes back that you are not at higher risk, I will have you come in every six months. DUH!! So, no testing for me haha.

                                  Melanoma is one of the "better" cancers to be at risk for, because early detection is the key. If you KNOW you are at risk, you go get checked and stay on top of it. My dermo in 2000 also told me that if a melanoma started growing the very day after my six month check, it would still be surgically removable at the next six month check. 

                                  So you are not silly!! I am so glad you reached out for help because hopefully you have found comfort. Since your mother in law died from the disease, it is totally understandable. But now your wife is forewarned. And your children, when they come, will have sunscreen on them all the time I bet! My grandad, my mom, and I did not. My own children did. They have never been sunburned!! Wish I could say the same, but it was a different time.

                                  You guys are in my thoughts and I wish you only the best as you go through the wonderful journey of life and marriage and parenthood!!

                                   

                                  • March 23, 2014 at 12:31 am
                                  Dean548
                                  Participant

                                    Thankyou very much for the kind words they are very reassuring! 

                                    im kind of thinking everyone is at a higher risk of some type of illness or disease than others so knowing about it and trying to do the best you can is better than not knowing I suppose?! 

                                    thanks again i appreciate your comments  

                                     

                                    dean

                                    • March 23, 2014 at 12:31 am
                                    Dean548
                                    Participant

                                      Thankyou very much for the kind words they are very reassuring! 

                                      im kind of thinking everyone is at a higher risk of some type of illness or disease than others so knowing about it and trying to do the best you can is better than not knowing I suppose?! 

                                      thanks again i appreciate your comments  

                                       

                                      dean

                                      • March 23, 2014 at 12:31 am
                                      Dean548
                                      Participant

                                        Thankyou very much for the kind words they are very reassuring! 

                                        im kind of thinking everyone is at a higher risk of some type of illness or disease than others so knowing about it and trying to do the best you can is better than not knowing I suppose?! 

                                        thanks again i appreciate your comments  

                                         

                                        dean

                                  Viewing 5 reply threads

                                  Tagged: 

                                  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
                                  About the MRF Patient Forum

                                  The MRF Patient Forum is the oldest and largest online community of people affected by melanoma. It is designed to provide peer support and information to caregivers, patients, family and friends. There is no better place to discuss different parts of your journey with this cancer and find the friends and support resources to make that journey more bearable.

                                  The information on the forum is open and accessible to everyone. To add a new topic or to post a reply, you must be a registered user. Please note that you will be able to post both topics and replies anonymously even though you are logged in. All posts must abide by MRF posting policies.

                                  Popular Topics